And its almost one year...less than 24 hours and counting.

Tomorrow marks the day.


The day I have been dreading for some time.


Tomorrow is the one year anniversary of John's death.  He passed at 12:55 PM on 1/31/2013.


Today has not been easy.  I am worried about how hard tomorrow might be.


This all still feels like some crazy nightmare that I cant possibly be living through.  But I am.  And one year passed in the blink of an eye and things may be...different...but they surely are not easier.


I don't even know what to expect of tomorrow...this situation still sucks so bad. 


I just want my damn life back.

Anniversary

Today would’ve been my 9th wedding anniversary with John.

Heartbroken doesn’t even begin to cover how I feel today. I miss him so much, I grieve for him heavily and I grieve for our children, who miss him but have no real clue on all that they are missing out without their father, knowing one day it will really hit them what it meant to lose their amazingly loving father at such young ages.

I’d give anything for a few minutes to just look at his face, or talk to him.

My poor John, how I wish you were still with us…more than anyone will ever know.